Friday, December 08, 2006

Dhoom 2 - The Crucification

I am feeling criminal to blog on this topic for 2 reasons:

01) I am wasting my time on things not worth talking about.
02) I am wasting my blog space and misusing my freedom of blogging for free.

But I still intend to go ahead and abuse my freedom of expression for reasons like these:
I read some article in the newspaper where a kid stole his uncle's money to watch this movie and a few days back some kid killed himself as he was not allowed to see this movie.

So my advice:
Please let them go ahead and watch the movie; trust me, that will serve them as a punishment enough! Never again will they ever insist on watching some movie just because it is over-hyped. They will mature right away to think before acting desperate to watch some movie just because the promoter's begging them to. So in a way, this post is for a social cause.

Things I learnt from this movie:
01) Queen of England's bodyguards cannot aim at a stable standing body.
02) One can use a skateboard to protect oneself from the bullets.
(The rumors are strong that the Mithun Chakraborthy's concept of splitting the bullet into two parts is being researched upon. The dynamics and the probabilities are all being calculated for implementing them in Dhoom 3).
03) One can stay submerged in waters for as long as possible and as silent as possible using a water scooter. Submarines are outdated now!
04) Aishwarya Rai should give up on acting.
05) Abhishek Bachan should join a gym and fast! His belly is quite well pronounced when Hritik stands besides him and he gives a tough competition to Aishwarya Rai when it comes to biceps!
06) Bipasha has one of the best butts Indian cinema's ever seen!
07) Sunehari lives in Andheri. Sunehari Andheri.
08) I am hot = I am feeling hot.
09) Bipasha's bikini is "cute". (Becca said so, so it must be true. All I care for is "what lies beneath")
10) One has to love someone so much that one should be able to kill this loved one for the sake of love. (It is a really complicated phenomenon, only seen to be understood)
11) Mumbai cops use helicopters.
12) A thief steals one night and is the item-boy or item-girl the next night!
13) To get the attention of some dude, all a chick has to do is, place two fingers before one's eyes and ask, "So are you like checking me out?"
14) Wear a Hawaiian shirt over a "Rolling Lips". That's fashion for you man! Ask AB!
15) Brazil has given up Latino and Samba, Punjabi pop-shit's the in-thing there!
16) Aishwarya should learn to walk and stand like a normal female. Ramp is not the only place females walk on!
17) The movie should've done away with:
The songs, the director and the production unit, the dialogue/script writer, the story writer (if there was one), Rimi Sen, Bipasha Basu, Uday Chopra, Aishwarya Rai and rest other jokers, even Abhishek Bachan. The movie could've just been about Hritik Roshan and the way he steals and it would've still done as well!
18) This movie is equivalent to movies like Kaal, Veer Zara and Waqt (the other crappy movies I was made to see in a theatre).

The list really goes on but really, I am sleepy now and I have spent good 20 minutes on this post, wasting even a single second more would be unjust towards me, you and the movie (cause it just doesn't deserve it).

Trust me, even if I intend to make a spoof on this one, I can't, as the movie is a spoof in itself!

My Rating: 0.005/10


heh? ok said...

now i can't wait to watch it

raghu said...

i loooove the tags.. havnt cin.. thank my lucky starts 4 dis.. :D:D
i hav some AMAZING MITHUN vids.. u havta c it.. deadly stuff.. which i thot ver jus legends or sumthin..:P

Sneha said...

i haven't seen it.. see, see.. my prudence!

//Veer Zara .... other [b]crappy[/b] movies

excuse me! don't you say a word against that movie! i adored it.. well, iam not srk's fan (ick.. rather i think it's high time he retired) but i lovved this movie, well.. for several reasons.

hahah.. all such overhyped bolly flicks end up being utter crap.. haha.. that's why i don't watch them :D smart me! :P:P

so glad the formidable exams are over! enjoy your days of freedom!

wanderer said... thats wat i call a dhoom-aakedar movie review!!!

sun4none said...

@sangy: really? :P

@rag: send me the mithun vids man.. i wanna watch thm man.. they are jst so so awesome :P

@sneha: yes yes! smart gal u are! there was never a doubt bout it! ;)

umm.. veer zara sucked man! sorry! but yeah! it jst was too funny! thy'd shown sharukh khan peeing in tht movie.. yuck! :P.. hehe! therez one scene in which he pouring water while talking to rani mukherji.. his face only can be seen and both his hands are down.. thn u hear water sound.. it looks as if hez peeing.. heheheh!

@wanderer: thank u thank u! tera bloog update kar yaar! :)

Divya said...

Hahahahahaha!! Ok i liked Dhoom 2 and i Loved Veer Zaara but watta review!! loved it!! Sneha, im with ya.. hate SRK.. wish he wud sit at home n smoke in privacy... oh man suk ur too much!!!

sun4none said...

@sneha and div: how cud u like veer zara? the very concept of some chut waiting for 22 yrs seems ridiculous and idiotic to me.. i 4got most of the movie really.. but wateeva i recall of it.. i jus recall stuff like "horny zara".. arey.. she is.. imagines srk stripping her and all yaa.. thn htt peeing scene i talked bout.. thn the court scenes which were jst so hilarious! wat weak arguements placed by the supposedly best lawyer "anupam kher".. phew! finally.. the most ridiculous concept as was mentioned in tuitanic too.. falling in "luuuuuv" in jst 4 days! blah! thts crap n it just cannot happen! :S

raghu said...

hahah..suk im on rur side
saala i rmbr dat court scence he walks like a complete retarded.. budda vich cims more like a guy wid a broken leg or hw can 1 guy b stuck wid a gal 4 like 20 yrs man..i mean marriage is diffrent but jus obssesed wid 1 gal like dat:PPPPP
i vaguely recall dat in dis movie.. ders sum lawyer/is der.. oh ya rani mukku.. but she dnt fall in love wid srk?
hmnm.. i dnt rmbr.. but she shud na.. i mean so much shes doin 4 him n all.. :D.. in yash raj movies ders supposed 2 complicated loooong love stories na.. so technically rani shud fall in love
but does she?
no idea:P

sun4none said...

abey ragz.. thts sensible yaa.. after stuck in prison for like 22 yrs in depression tht too.. u r bound 2 walk like some 70+ guy.. but yeah.. rani shud've fallen for him.. thn she shd;'ve tried 2 seduce him man.. thn thngs wud've got so spicy :P.. horny rani :P

heh? ok said...

yes, really. nin and i are so taken by your review that we cannot miss the opportunity to laugh our heads off at ash, ab jelly belly, hirthik the dance dude and our fave, uday "neal the rockstar" chopra. and veer zaara was bad enough without suk and raghu's creative contributions, so leave well enough alone!

sim said...

yes yes..bhery good!!! but i am still going to watch it and enjoy it!!! :)

sun4none said...

yes.. simi, sangy and anky.. go on.. enjoy! if poss.. meet the director n tell him.. I WANT MAH MONEY BACK!

Pari said...

yaar, yeh toh dekhni padegi!:P
btw, the splitting the bullet thingy was rajnikant, not mithun...

sun4none said...

@peri: was it? i am thinkin it as mithun.. havta confirm this

raghu said...

ya mithun was vel u can call it CURVING the bullet ovr the wall.. very..err.. entertainin
but really.. u must c the fights btwn mithun n gulshun grover...
its jus sooo koool
no wonder the movies ver a hit.