Sunday, January 17, 2010

There is a new discotheque in town

And it's called my room.

One blessed morning, when the sun decided to set on me, a female was invited to our house. Let's call her "The Cunt". She boasted of having Vaastushastra knowledge and decided that our place was filled with negativities. So she decided to take advantage of our Holy Gods and explained us that our home wasn't constructed right. There were some issues with the directions. Hence, there was too much inflow of negative energy from all the directions into our house. But these issues can be made right if we start trapping the positive energy at the right places. This shall help our lives in various ways. As the days passed by, her influence over my family kept on increasing and poor me had to bear the consequences of the situation, as a result. Inevitable? Yes so! Because the first point she made was the Blessed Eddie, beautifully painted on my door reflected a sign of negative energy that has accumulated inside of my head. Absence of Gods in my room, really upset her. The fact that I don't believe in His Holy existence upset her more. She passed her judgement, Eddie needs to be washed away and Gods need to enter my room. I told her I can help her getting to the exit door really fast. She didn't think it was funny. So she decided to take her revenge. She got hold of these positive pyramids from somewhere and implanted them inside of my room, onto the walls. As if she was reading my mind and my intentions, she decided to not use fevicol, like any cheap Indian idiot, but to make use of drills and screws. Thus, six brilliant pyramids got screwed onto my walls and into my life. I swear I saw a smirk on her face, after she left my room with bundle of notes in her hand. Now someday, when I'll have enough money and time to waste, I'll implant a few disco lights inside of these pyramids and dance my heart out to Disco Deewane.

Till then, adios.

Here is Eddie. He eats your guts if you hate him. Adorable.