Delhi Murders Justified.. Almost

Conversation between a bored jobless man [BJM] and a tired drunk wage slave [TDWS]:

BJM: Dude.. you read the report on the crazy reasons for which people were murdered in Delhi?
TDWS: No dude, there have been enough depressing things happening in my life these days.

[BJM starts anyway]

BJM: A waiter was killed for not serving papad!
TDWS: We have a papad killer!
BJM: Dude.. this guy can kill for papad. Can you imagine the respect he must be getting from the cooks in the cells! He must be standing right in front and shouting 'Yo! I can kill for papad'
TDWS:: I'd like to know what else he can do for a papad, man.

BJM: Someone was killed for not playing the "right" music at a marriage celebration.
TDWS: Dude.. one can't take more than two songs from Himesh. I am with the killer on this one.
BJM: Agreed.

BJM: A 14-year-old was battered to death with his own cricket bat by his 19-year-old friend, after he refused to admit he was out.
TDWS: Cricket is a game of passion dude. Justified.

BJM: Husband kills his wife for not washing his shirt.
TDWS: I am sure the husband wanted to test if the new detergent, Vanish, can really help vanish the DNA marks off the cloth.
BJM: Getting away with murder.. aah..

BJM: Failure to give bus direction.. I defend the guy
TDWS: Explain...
BJM: Just go to Pune and ask anyone for directions over there. 7 out of 10 times you'll get to the spot where you had met your "guide" and the other 3 times you'll be minimum 99.568 kms away from your intended destination.
TDWS: Well in that case the "guide", as you call him, should be smart. He should give you the wrong direction and should not be present: 1. where he was standing at the time of giving directions 2. where he has led you and 3. at your actual destination of course.
BJM: So when in Pune, you take directions from a shopkeeper.
TDWS: And carry Vanish detergent with you.
BJM: Of course.